


Respect

by lunaseemoony



Category: Rab C Nesbitt (TV), Teninch - Fandom, True Love (TV)
Genre: Family Drama, Family Fluff, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-11
Updated: 2018-02-11
Packaged: 2019-03-16 12:49:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,005
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13636632
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lunaseemoony/pseuds/lunaseemoony
Summary: Two years after leaving her teaching job, Holly isn’t 100% sure what her orientation is. She explains this to her mum, but also that she deserves to be listened to and supported regardless.





	Respect

Holly’s fingers migrated from twirling her hair to crumpling the hem of her jumper to fishing into her purse for a scrap of paper. Her train ticket came up, and before she folded it into an origami flower it read: Friday, London to Margate. It was now Saturday, and Holly was seated at her mum’s table peeling potatoes for lunch. Her mum had admittedly thus far behaved but tension had crept in with the morning fog. It was coming, she could smell it like the pungence in the air before a summer storm.

 

“Have you given him a ring yet?”

 

In came the storm. She feigned ignorance. “Who, mum?”

 

“My friend’s coworker. Nice man, you’d like him.”

 

Holly nicked her finger with the peeler and hissed. “I’ve told you mum, I’m not really into men. And if you tell me I haven’t met the right one yet I’m walking out that door right this moment.”

 

Two years ago Holly left her teaching job. The following day she’d sat down with Karen’s parents and told them everything, ready to bear the consequences. While Karen sobbed across the room Holly explained she’d made a critical error in judgement. She hadn’t expected any less than the choice words Karen’s parents shouted at her, ignoring Karen’s quickly researched claims to the legality of the situation and her given consent to it. Provided time Holly trusted Karen would understand none of it mattered. Holly was meant to be responsible as a teacher, and took the shame of it with her and her belongings to London. Even if nobody could see her guilt it was as present to Holly as the blood trickling from her finger as she rinsed it in the sink.

 

Her mum reached up to fetch a plaster from a dusty tea tin above the fridge and wrapped it around Holly’s finger. “So you’re gay.”

 

“I dunno.”

 

“It’s been two years and you don’t know?”

 

Holly sat back down at the table and saved her scowl for the potatoes. She took the peeler to them just a bit harsher than she had before as her mum leaned up against the sink with folded arms and knit brows aimed at her.

 

“Why’s that so important? I barely trust myself these days but when I tell you I’m not interested in something you could at least try to be respectful. I tried men for years. They’re just not for me. Part of me wonders if I was wrong about being straight, what if later I work out I’m wrong about being gay? Just because I’m not ready to put a label on my orientation doesn’t mean I’m still interested in men. I might some day work out I do still like men, who knows? But it’s my life to figure out, mum. Not yours or anyone’s. I just want your trust and support, that’s all. Listen to me, for once.”

 

Adrenaline shook the life out of Holly’s hands and lips. She pushed her chair back, dropped the peeler, and dug her fingers into her jeans as she inhaled a few deep breaths for strength. That was as clear as she’d ever managed to articulate it to her mother, but she still felt she shouldn’t have had to. And they both knew it. Holly’s baby pictures still riddled her mum’s flat, with hopes of pairing them with Holly’s own child that might never come. Her mum held that hope for dear life and it showed, no matter how many times she claimed to want Holly’s happiness.

 

Even Holly’s friends, as supportive as they believed themselves to be, couldn’t bring themselves to listen. They said they’d tried but it showed in some harsh ways. Holly had been interested in men for so many years, what had changed all of a sudden, they’d ask her. To her credit even after she moved to London she went out on a few dates with one, just to be sure. Her friends’ comments about how cute she and the man had looked together grated on Holly’s ears like sandpaper after they broke it off. She’d lost a few friends. Holly dreamed of a day when being anything but straight didn’t involve so much heartache. From it she gained a drop of courage to sneak into a gay bar to find people who may understand her. It’s where she met Davina.

 

“Your roommate’s a man though, so you’ll forgive my confusion I hope.”

 

“Davina is a _woman_ , mum. I’d hoped you two can meet but I won’t put her through that if you can’t use her proper pronouns. She’s transgender.”

 

“I’m still learning, darling. Give me some credit. Alright then, why not her?”

 

Holly handed her mum the bowl of peeled and cut potatoes, who then emptied them into the fryer basket. She was fairly certain her mum hadn’t seen the blush on her face. “I dunno. She’s my roommate, it’d be awkward if it didn’t work out. And I don’t know if she likes women.”

 

One thing hadn’t gone amiss though, and that was the little smile blossoming on her mum’s face. “You know, some things don’t change. When you’re frightened of something you really want, Holly, you put it off the longest. Took you ages to apply for art school.”

 

Holly unfolded her origami flower and started making something else. What, she wasn’t certain yet. Much like her life, if she did say so herself. “What’re you getting at, mum?”

 

“Well for one thing that when you’re nervous you fidget a lot.” She nodded at the origami in Holly’s hands. “And that we’ll try this your way. You haven’t said anything about me meddling with your love life with _women_. So I was thinking next month I might fancy a weekend in London, meet this lady friend of yours.”

 

Relief drew Holly’s mum into her arms. From what, she couldn’t quite articulate yet. Emotions were bubbling up everywhere and vying for her attention. What she did know was it was a start. She’d take it.


End file.
